Dazed and Confused

i’m exhausted, and yet my head is spinning.  i’m tired, and yet there’s another resume to be done and sent out.  answers.  yes i have some answers, but not the answers i wanted.  packing.  there’s more packing and hauling to be done, and yet all i want to do right now is go to bed.  pull the covers over my head, and hide from the world.  i don’t want to deal with this.  not yet.  i’m not ready.

the furcrew have been pushed to their limits too.  i can feel it.  happiness and hope have been sucked from our bones.  we have been pushed beyond what most call “being tested”.  that’s the name of the game these days tho.  it’s everywhere. 

a few weekends ago, me and friend were up the road in g-town.  we stopped into a second hand store that was going out of business.  with us, there were a total of about 5-6 women hanging around the counter.  all of our whoas were the same.  all of us but one, were in a home that was in forclosure.  another didn’t know how she wasn’t, and yet despite having a home, there were some days the fridge was empty and it stayed that way for awhile.  to look at us all, you would of thought we were all just fine, but these days, that isn’t the name of the game.  we  all had our own furcrews.  another commonality.  they were lucky enuff that their pending forclosures hadn’t pushed them to wonder how they were going to provide for their furbabies.  fortunate?  or what it just a matter of time? 

these times seem to be testing so many.  have a massive education like me?  good luck.  most likely employers look at it and run.  hire me?  not a chance ’cause when things get better, they know i’m gonna look for better.  who wouldn’t?  but sometimes i wonder.  will it ever get better?

answers.  yes i have some, but not the ones that i wanted.  so close to a job, i can almost taste it, and yet my mortgage company won’t work with me.  they said no to a one week delay on the forclosure sale, and demanded that i fax to them tonight income varification.  a letter from the employer varifiying my job  and salary weren’t going to be enough, and they weren’t willing to postpone the sale by one week just to give me a little more time.  it had to be tonight or nothing at all. 

today i also received a letter from the homeowner’s insurance company saying that my policy would be compromised if the place wasn’t cleaned up.  this because everything had been moved into the front room due to me packing, and to get it out of the way of the flooded room when the pipes broke in the spare bedroom; that is what the adjuster saw when he came into the home to assess the damage. 

are they kidding me??  ask me if i give a f***k??!!! 

a little over one more week and i won’t be here. we won’t be here.   it’ll b there problem.  in that respect at least I’ll have that off my back.  maybe that weight will make things a little lighter on the furcrew as well.  i hope so.  we all need our burden lightened. 

tomorrow another interivew and the following day another.  both jobs hold very strong potential for me.  one’s in the same town as family, and the other is up the road in g-town where i wanna be.  where i planned to make a new start.  hopefully i will have an asnwer from them by the end of this week.  i am hopeful, but right now all i wanna do is crawl under the covers with my dogs around me and my cats crawled on top of me.  and so… that is what i do.

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